Astroglide & Milk

After work, I stopped into Target to pickup eggs, a birthday card and a bunch of other items I didn't really need (gotta love this place) and as I approached the checkout line I noticed this woman who clearly was some sort of a crackhead, maybe meth. In either case, she seemed to be in a big rush and was sighing as we waited in line, she had jumped behind me as put my eggs on the belt. I noticed she didn't put anything on the belt though. She noticed that I had a coupon in my hand and she was in awe and kept going on about how excited she was that Target accepted coupons. As I was paying I noticed the gallon of milk, so I think...she must've walked to Target because she has dirty toes, wearing flip flops and I am sure she has no car, so she came to get some milk. But if she is in such a rush, why didn't she go to 7-11 right around the corner??? All of these stories and mental images are flying through my mind THEN as I am picking up my bags I hear her tell the 15 yr old checkout girl that the milk is not hers, but that "this is all I am getting" and she hands over a $6 tube of Astroglide. I totally giggled out loud and she shot me a nasty look. I thought it was hysterical. This woman was in a huff and a puff at 9pm in Target, just for lube.
You just can't make this shit up.

Song for the day: Caring is Creepy - The Shins