Not Maui or Wowie (pt.1)

I actually slept both flights to Kauai with no anxiety and arrived only somewhat stinky but was ready to hit the first bar, since it was nearly happy hour (and I started on the plane)! So the crew picked me up at the airport and we headed to Poipu. Marilyn (no nickname for that one) and I went to a groovy place

After one drink, we picked up the other fagbags and headed to the "condo" in Princeville which seemed like forever away but was probably only about an hour. After we cleaned up a bit we had a photo session

and went to Tahiti Nui in Hanalei.

While we were on our second drink, a local drunk, Jerry began to make small talk with KC. He was harmless enough. KC left for a pee and Jerry was hanging around Marilyn. THEN the the freaking bitch starts telling him to walk away and leave her alone etc. Ummm, he was barely talking to her! So....from what i remember KC comes back and Marilyn tells her to get the guy away from her. KC doesn't really see the problem either and is trying to figure it out but all Bitch can do is keep bitching! SOOOO...I throw some salt on the two of them hoping to break it up and give her something else to think about but that doesn't happen. She gets rowdy with me and then her and Huggies leave. Now KC is missing and I don't give a flying fug. So I continue to drink and enjoy the atmosphere. A while later I cannot find KC, she's freaking missing. I don't have a phone or her # so I ask for the phone to call a cab. The bartender laughs at me. "We don't have that here". Huh??? No cabs? Nope, only to go to the airport. OMG! So I wander around outside searching for KC, nowhere to be found. Could this get worse? Did i mention its my FIRST night?
So some local hears of the dilemma and lets me use his phone to call Huggies. Huggies says she cannot come and get me and that KC is not there. BITCH has the car and is not coming to get us. So sitting outside smoking butts with this stranger, he spots KC on a picnic table in someones front lawn. Great!
She wanders over, sits and starts to vomit all over the place. She is crying, its a fucking mess. Did i mention its my FIRST night? :)
So...the guy says he'll give us a ride back but he wants to drink for a while more and he'll be out in an hour. Ugh. Huggies calls KC and says they'll come and get us. Bitch arrives and bitches the whole time back. I am ready to get a hotel at this point.
Before:

After:


I guess she does have a nickname!